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Happy healthy minds

I’ve been a bit of a mess – mood-wise – this last month. I know I am the only person who can change this.

So time to move forward and look to the future.

THANK YOU Morgan @ UNIQUELOVEHARMONEY  for this awesome tag. I love your heart and spirit. You write straight from the heart and you are just a wonderful spirit I have connected within the Word Press community.  I have been saving it for a day like today. When I need to give myself a kick up the backside.

 

SIMPLE HAPPY RULES

1. Name 5 things that make you happy
2. Name 5 songs that make you happy
3. Nominate 5 bloggers to continue the tag

DAISY IS HAPPY BECAUSE:

  1. I‘m co-producing and co-facilitating my first Depression and Anxiety workshop for Parents, in Boothtown, U.K., with Healthy Minds tomorrow 27/06. I did most of the groundwork before the wedding and I can’t wait to hook up and finalise details and then roll on Wednesday and BOOM! We get to do something creative and hopefully helpful.

  2. I have officially been given the go-ahead to do the 5 days 9-5 pm WRAP  Facilitator training in Mirfield, in September with Hope charity. I have done this 12-week course myself and I now get a chance to turn other people onto the power of WRAP.

WRAP PROMO VIDEO

  1. I still have the motivation to keep fit and do exercise. I had a really good one-hour session this morning and my mood has lifted a little bit more.

  2. I’m moving to France in the next two years. A new start. I proud to be a part of the EU. I spent two days crying after the result. I am a humanist. I hate manipulation of the working class people and then them being told that they exercised their democratic right to vote. I love the French public because they give their government hell. The public demand to have their voices heard and I want to live in a place where my voice is truly heard and actioned

  3. Finally, I am married. I have a few more pictures from the day that just makes me smile every time I look at them. The people who were there made it even more epic!

Here’s what is getting me to smile:

 

 

FIVE SONGS THAT MAKE  DAISY HAPPY

THE SONG I DEDICATED TO MY GAZ AND OUR FIRST AND ONLY WEDDING DANCE

https://vimeo.com/92967713

 

EMPOWERING AND GODDAMN BOLD!

 

MY FUCK EVERYTHING SONG

 

JUST A GREAT TUNE

https://vimeo.com/13401029

LOVE SNOOP – YEAH, IT’S SEXIST BUT I HAVE GOT A SENSE OF HUMOUR. – I’M A SUCKER FOR A DUDE WHO CAN MAKE ME LAUGH … SHOOT ME!

 

 I could go on all day with music….

Oh okay – One more

5 BLOGS THAT NEVER FAIL TO MAKE ME SMILE – TAG YOU ARE IT!

 

  1. QUEEN BEE – I SING THE BODY ELECTRIC–  a great friend 
  2. SIMPLY ETTA D.– someone who motivates me
  3. LINDA G. HILL   -Always inspires me to write
  4. CHARLIE ZERO  – The sickest poet I know. The biggest heart too x
  5. Send Sunshine -Again she never fails to lift my spirits
  6.  EVERYONE ELSE I FOLLOW AND AM YET TO!

 

Passed Humanities degree

I’ve finally received my results for my 1st year, doing my Masters, in Creative writing.

Drum rolls.

PASS-with merit. I officially can use more random letters after my name — ha ha!

I  am now in possession of a post-graduate certificate in the Arts and Humanities!

Wow! Amazing.

How’s this going to help me with what I won’t do?

I have a dream.

I do. 😀

One of my goals is to move back to France. They love people with diplomas. I hope to get a well paid job there. I need to book a trip to The French embassy later on this year. My husband has decided he is going to take on my surname and become a French national.  He’s English!

He’s not only English, he is  Northern, from  West Yorkshire.

 

 

I feel so uneasy about my family not having a passport. My entire life, It was drummed into me to always have my passport (in date)in case, we moved countries.

Which we did- a lot!

Moving on . ( pun unintentionally intended  :D)

What’s  happening in my life?

Loads of shit- ha ha! as usual.

I’m doing better –  I keep making a come back.  Oh, life – you little tease!

Dare me to live.

 Dare me to succeed!

Challenge accepted.

 

 

MENTAL HEALTH UPDATE

Yeah, it’s been.

up and down,

down ,

down ,

down –

up again ,

very up –

insanely manic,

toxic,

low,

not quite sure

,emotional ,

aargh why did that and that and that and ..

did I do that?

Those kind of moments, really.

Surely someone can relate?

Not happy about a medication increase in my anti depressant.

I don’t of any person who is on  (high/ highest legal doses) of

Two antidepressants

Two anti psychotics

Two anti anxiety tablets,

and sleeping medication.

I know  my health posse want the best for me.

I don’t bullshit them.

I tell if I’ve been using shit coping mechanisms, good ones. Thoughts ,feelings…

I made my psychiatrist laugh.

Go me!

He offered me psychology therapy — again .

I was like:

‘Look Dr J, seriously every time I sign up to a pyschologist , they leave!’

 All my psychologists have left me half way through  doing whatever new pycho babble, current trend treatment , is used, to deal with folk such as myself.

One dude, fell asleep in a couple of our sessions.

So, I was like

‘ Listen, I know how to use CBT/DBT, I know how to communicate and talk. I know what keeps me well . I just want a cure’

Another laugh escapes from Dr J.

He is a legend.

A legend ? yes, but not a wizard 😦

He totally gets me and I feel I have a choice in medication changes etc..

I’ve asked to come off one of my meds because I don’t see the point of being on it. It hasn’t helped me.

These meds have affected my memory. I’m terrified of getting Dementia. I’ve been on (legal) tablets since I was 13/14 and I’ve never been off medication.

Never!

Talking about memory.

I’m using my creative outlets to start getting into the open mic poetry scene .

I love performing but my memory is really rubbish. I’m going to brave it by doing more live poetry next week. I’m excited. Nervous.  It’s all good.

I have my final year of my MA to keep me — super  occupied.  There is a lot of work to do. For part of my thesis ( check me out)

I’m thinking of using my blog to interview creative folk who live in my community to talk about, their work,  (durr!)  Creativity and their mental health. My photographer mate is on board to take pictures. Some people have shown interest — yeah!

My heads occupied which is good.

Fab!

Awesome!

How will doing this  help me with my thesis and final work?

Well, I am going to use this year of discovery and research on the link between mental health and creativity as an alternative form of therapy to cope with life’s unpredictable moments.

Then I  will have loads of inspiration to write a film script (120 minutes) on a character ,who , is thrown back into society after a long stint in mental /prison  institutions , and who is looking to find him/herself  and another way of being  and expressing him/herself  positively, in society.

The opening scene will kind of look like this

I have an ending – (a bit abstract at the moment) – saying there words:

‘I look around for the first time with clarity. And see I’m exactly where I need to be. Around the misfits. The beautiful misfits just like me.’

DAISY’S UN NAMED CHARACTER

It’s all early days and I still have  4 scripts to write, a critique and a character  analysis on a famous playwright to do before the final chapter.

All in all. I’m alive, optimistic-ish, full of emotion, drive, passion , a pain in the ass but just doing my thing. 

All terribly boring really… 😀 

So, I am back!

I can’t commit daily to blogging but I have joined a group on Facebook.  

Shout out to Gary @ fiction is food  for adding me.

It’s a website for us!

BIG UP YOUR BLOG!

Bloggers.

 I’m  a newbie, its good be around other bloggers again. I’m hoping it will keep me  off Facebook and keep me connecting with people like yourself. People who use their time more productively. Doh, oh the irony.

One rant before I go :   I wish people would stop leaving public posts about my appearance on my Facebook.

If you ever happen to read this

I know you are having a shit time dealing with your own weight issues. I’m well aware of mine. Please take a look at yourself. Look after yourself first. If you don’t – FUCK OFF! 

 

That is a wrap.  I know. Hilarious! ha ha!

Thank you so much for reading

Time to step out and live real life..

Catch up soon!

What’s everyone else doing with life?  Blogging?

I’m genuinely curious to know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wellness Recovery Action Program part 1 follow up

I hope some of you have been able to put down some of the things that make you happy and keep you well and in a good place- mentally and healthily. To find out how to prepare your own ‘wellness toolbox then please click on this link. In the video, I refer to letting me or another blogger challenge you to do something good for yourself.
This weeks session we had a guest speaker who originally did the WRAP course 5 years ago and still credits her wellbeing to this plan. What I did today was think about how  I FEEL when I am well. What I DO when I am well ie; how I behave. I realise for some people this will be a hard thing to try and think about especially if a person has been unwell or has a complicated situation that needs addressing. You don’t need to make a huge list.
If you put one thing down then that is cool. Be as simple or creative as you want. The whole point is to get it down in a place that you can access it easily. One reason to get this out your head and crystallised is to say for example you are having the worst day imaginable and all you can think about is how shit you are and how you have nothing going. Get this piece of paper out to remind yourself that what you may be thinking at a stressful time in your life is not the truth. Get a piece of paper or type in WORD these headings: 
 WHAT I AM LIKE WHEN I AM WELL.
HOW I FEEL:
WHAT I DO:
HOW OTHER PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME   (I found this the hardest of the 3 to do but as I say in my video update, once you have done this exercise ask someone who knows you well how they would describe you when you are well.  This is a powerful reinforcer of who you are as a person especially when you need a boost and a reminder
EXAMPLES OF HOW I FEEL WHEN I AM WELL

EXAMPLES OF HOW I FEEL WHEN I AM WELL

WHAT I DO WHEN I FEEL WELL

WHAT I DO WHEN I FEEL WELL

HOW OTHER PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME AND HOW I THINK PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME WHEN I AM WELL

HOW OTHER PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME AND HOW I THINK PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME WHEN I AM WELL

P.S. I’d do it again in a heart beat

*Prompt FORBIDDEN LOVE*

Forbidden love shell-shock hearts with echoes of the gun shots .

Bang!

Fall to the floor .

Emotions mastery of us;

The puppets.

 

Universal soldiers we plea the heart must be acquiesce .

Ration it’s rational .

It’s bled blood red.

We walk — fine machines-

 

Bang!

Bang!

Bang!

 

Trivialise the flesh armour riddled with holes

Glimpsing sight of gleaming ivory bones.

Savage howls at  muscles contracting   into  contorted wounds.

Turn on the cannibals of Lust.

Devour us they must.

 

Tokoloshe monster

Neither height nor a warm bed will keep the heart away from

The obsessive frenzy of orchestrated, sexual slumber.

 

Denial of sacred sensory codes embedded within

 Mind will saunter in  Possessed —

Create a haunting soundscape of phantasmagoria.

 

Convince us that  forbidden love is worth the loss

Of Not only the Super Ego or the Ego but the Id —

That’s three parts of you or me.

 

Never regret times spent close to another body — chemistry is divine.

Aphrodite’s Divine presence

Unwraps our Im-pulses to climax to a primal rhythm .

Kindred spirits simultaneously reach the peak of a shared orgasm —

The body can’t hide from the  demon soul  inside .

 

Found: Inner Panacea

*only you can decide which oddities are worth keeping or eliminating some most definitely are worth keeping- the ones that make you feel alive keep- the ones that make you feel ugly and insignificant -discard*

TIP  FOR  A SENSE OF EMPOWERMENT:

Expose

Detox

Eliminate

Cleanse

 repeat regularly. 

Bonjour tristesse, I leave you without a second glance.

6hours to go until a new dawn greets me with its fiery dance.

No amount of Moons ago,  could I  foresaw this trip to  such a  bodacious planet.

Lavender dreams interrupted by the need for a bubble bath to cleanse my soul,

enrich my palate.

How it  leaves me in stark clarity,

 other daisies grow wildly in meadows.

2 am cleanse off- eliminate others’ unwanted worries and troubles.

Herbal tea infusions – a meet up with friends who know about life’s true haggles.

Comments intended to cut to the core.

Manage to lick-up   one salty tear

begging for more.

A soul is awoken when it faces all directions.

Never blind yet always courageous to evoke dear affections.

Common goals shared by trolls made by the same finger pointing corporation

Pity those who continue to live not a decade but over half a century in miserable devastation.

Hot water filling a tub – a sauna to enlight.

Voices

You are “divorced”, a drama queen, I only wanted a  shag.

It tickled your delight to dangle carrots when I was newly married

you are most certifiably unbecoming the state of inner jihad.

I’m  having fun acting in a workshop.

That accent is dreadful I can sign you up for electrocution elocution lessons.

Don’t mind me having a gas- the whole purpose of improvisation is to get involved.

 Don’t use me as a pawn for fear of being put under your harsh self-imposed scrutiny.

You are ugly.

 the biggest topic under dissection in a house full of self-confessed millionaires.

All those beatings, and  Sangria holiday hangovers yet,

 still, no permanent fix for happiness to last longer than a child’s joy at the penultimate of funfairs.

Three perfect lessons in all that is wrong not  with me, but with others,

who can’t equate strength alongside vulnerability.

How can it be true that the two run side by side like rivers?

 merging into one ocean of clear waters.

Confucianism arise in accountability.

No one can possess opposing characteristics!

 She does not conform to why we hate her

so, now we must turn up the  gas lighter

 justify our vexes and vehemence to assure we are credible witnesses, to attest, this Red lettered calamity remains  hidden,

 In dead carcasses.

Oh, Shame!

we shall honor you and remain her loyal Foe.

A few written words, at an ungodly hour.

I’ve never been one to conform to another with power.

Time is up, my bath tub is run.

Imagine it freestanding.

careless in an era where it is encouraged to be eccentrically unique. cartwheeling in a  quest to not only live and work hard,

 remember to have fun.

*inspired by toxic people.

Daisy, how can you just assume it’s other people who are toxic and not you?

Well, I say it takes one to know one.

I know how to be toxic, I’ve been toxic and I know how it feels to live away from toxic vibes and people. *

My True penny

I’m taking back my power.

I’ve got my ammo and my gun powder.

I’m not going to use it cos I’m more of a peace than a ‘fuck you -let’s bomb you to oblivion’ type of  person.

I have realised that  to allow someone who thinks nothing about me to have so much power to lure me into a paralysed state of persuasive perversion is:

 True insanity. I have my true penny and that is what counts.

I pushed him  away like a woman under attack –  I pushed  my lot away – until it formed blood clots on the insides – comparably sized to mounting a  herd of elephants.

unwilling to be ridden- trunks raised up, irate – exploding in  shouts.

I started to talk about what goes on in my head and my true penny told me that we all makeup scenarios in our minds, to make sense of the lives and situations we come across, in this world of an  uncertain,  never-ending skyline.

I thought I was losing it.

I thought I  was obsessed.

Turns out my brain works out  my issues based on characters and story lines and other  shenanigans.

Crazy?  maybe but creativity strokes  the  beat with a brush  –  I feel there is  almost a genius to be found walking on this fine line.

Swastikas and Reds are not my idea of interior decorating.

Tearing down my  walls.

One little Nazi’s thought is not going to make me come down to that kind of level.

I have my life.

 I am the queen of my disco.

I have retro  roller skates on .

 The sun is my Disco ball.  I’m on the rooftop, in the light-beaming under the  rays.

Not hiding in the dark, under the influence,an imposter.

A star that can’t twinkle, dishevelled – so shady – a back turns away –  It’s the one known as the  blue devil.

We are on two separate  paths –  I notice  the screams of a   shaken baby.

A rattle spins across the floor – Dummy dribbled with garbled spit.

I guess mommy is right when she says: ‘You always want what you can’t have’

It’s not infatuation, love or anything like that – This baby is  having a tantrum – she  didn’t get what she  wanted .

She  didn’t even get a maybe.

I’m done slithering  on my belly across damp floors.  Waiting for the next Gestapo, soot-stained  boot to squelch  me.

Turn out my guts until, all you can see is the insides of me- a sore sight of  limacine.

Phantom limb syndrome – I am back from the  war of past, oppressive obsession.

  I’m awake.

 Clarity.

Nightmares were all I had to grieve over.

 I didn’t lose any limbs. Only my inner self- belief .

 I’m a china teapot lady – I’m done  trying to find happiness in a person who happily  lives  life drinking out of cups made of polystyrene .

 The present is my greatest gift.   I’m not wasting another second wishing on  dreams that we can be friends.

My heart is my greatest ally and foe. It makes me work.

Dwarves getting their hoes to do all the work – chasing fairy dust ,  axe- picking fights with one another, to grow in a place under a roof of  artificial light.

Genuine and melodic – true light – mountain breeze is the only place I will find a place to atone.

To make amends.

Let it go and go with the flow

I stand before the world smiling – unashamed – this is my show.

 

SHOUT OUTS AND AWARD NOMINATATONS TO FOLLOW

 

Automatic

Longer post than usual

A song to get you through it. 😀

Where do I begin?

Right here, I suppose….

I never want to share my darkness with the blogging community. Well, what I mean is – I try to objectify my emotions when I write.

Turn it into  ART!

 Sometimes being creative just means no great ART display or flow of words but creativity means getting whatever is in my head and out of it.

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I want to be heard.  I am not invincible.

There is part of me that wishes I had one of those wind-up devices in me that didn’t just make me move, but makes me feel- the opposite to what I feel now .

That is not how this Blog began.

It began as a way to write what I wanted to put down and I have done that.

 Lately, I’ve lost a  certain joy in Blogging because I have been feeling  ashamed.

Ashamed ?

I am  trying my hardest to be everyone and everything.

‘I’m the success. I am making my life a success.’

That kind of mentality.

I get in such a blue funk when I read certain posts- that it brings me down in my mood to the point, I  can’t bear to read some posts.

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It is because I am in this nebulous place – no soft carpet on the bottom of the pit, my ass is numb, I can’t get comfortable.

I can’t seem to get out.

I put on my many masks.

I am looking at them now- I count 10 . Some look more exotic than the others.

Think, Charleston  Carnival Madness!

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I’m not feeling festive or even wanting to consume anything that could make me feel spirited.

The ones that truly know me –  are four people to be exact.

See ,  the true darkness  won’t let me smile ( look what I did!).

It spits phlegm  globules of doubts -splashes flecks of browns and greens  across my  eyes, my nose , my  mouth.

My outfit.

That obnoxious bus was never going to slow down. It saw me and changed gear and pushed harder on the accelerate peddle just because it could.

If I undress and leave all my clothes in a heap will anyone notice?

They might.

Will I actually be jolted into caring?

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It won’t let me – Let go.

My name is not Elsa or princess ‘whatever’- I can’t magic  giant  moving snowmen to show you the reason I am like this is because I may belong in a……..

morgue.

I just don’t want anybody touching my body and doing an  autopsy.

In case I am still alive . That would be horrific, to say the least.

I hate writing stuff like this.

I want to be a ray of sunshine.

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I want people to feel uplifted and energised around me.

I never ever want to knuckle drag anyone down to this point where your  ass feels numb and well…

Dark ages Alert.

So I hide the extent of just how Stormy my mind has become. Why  hide how  wan I feel inside?

Dead,Afraid, guilty even.

I can’t even let go  of a past person -why?

giphy (21)

 

I want to open a present from my past.

I don’t want to receive my present – from this-this moment.

Because that person doesn’t want me for whatever reason.

Married, friendship . I don’t know.

I hate not knowing.

I loathe feeling like I have given up control to someone.

I look around me – I have  an enchanting, little family around me.

Remarkable  really.

People love me and people want me to flex my muscles and win the trophy.

I am doing it.

Fear or no Fear.

My heart has   clumsily absorbed much  blood.

 This blood has formed congealed clots. They nestle around my beating heart.

Become complacent – they don’t want to move.

How can a heart harden yet weep at the same time?

 Contradictions.

I don’t give up. I damn well feel like it.

Call it the stubborn part of me.

It serves me well in some cases.

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I’ve decided what I am going to write about for my MA  — well, the first part of it.

A script about a wife and husband dealing with the wife’s infidelity. There is a twist. It’s all in her mind. She is obsessed. A stalker of sorts. The husband knows. Why does he play along?  She is ill. her mental health is not great.

I want whoever grades it to go:

‘Blimey/ fuck/ by Jove!/ Oh my hat!/’  or whatever the fuck expression they use when they are impressed and go ‘  I didn’t see that coming.’

The  next 18 months is me putting in a lot of graft.

This  anxiety  corset  grabs at me -gathers me – pulls me into a panic attack. I want to breathe – but I have to keep hold of my form.

I am in armour – uniform.

To be formless is to be Ovid’s chaos- on the first page of  his  ‘Metamorphoses’.

The thing is if I don’t share some of my weight bearers, then, I wonder what is the point of writing my blog at all.

It is just like in the real world – if someone can’t accept me for me at my worst -why should they only be allowed to see me at my best?

There is a person who ticked the box:

I am not a robot.

 Me: typing these words.

I have body parts. So many emotions…..

 I want to always write something that will blow peoples minds away .

We are all different and what may blow one mind may not even touch  another.

So this is me waffling in type. Always stream of consciousness.

Don’t feel like rhyming or using fancy words.

I just want to feel authentic.

I want my spark back. I’m going to be a bad Prometheus and get me some fire!

I have an idea  – find a joke!

How bout this one?

  • The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.

  • Some people say “If you can’t beat them, join them”. I say “If you can’t beat them, beat them”, because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.

  • Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

  • Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

  • Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says “If an emergency, notify:” I put “DOCTOR”. What’s my mother going to do?

  • . “To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet … you can hide but you can’t run.”

Fuck!

Google – is  shit for jokes or am I really that down -I can’t see the humour in these jokes to really make me LAFF OUT LOUD!

Anyone know any good jokes?

On a lighter note, I am alive and I have not been looking at grave sites.

I know how to swim!

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I Believe!​

“BELIEVE in you and see what transpires”

Daisy

Remember this?

 

I think my hourglass has a hole in it.  😀 😀

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Ok.

So it is that time to sing all your praises – new flowers and trees / plants – whatever you wish to be.

WELCOME TO THE WILLOWS.

This is what I do each week. SHOUT OUTS!

I give a shout out and share a post from your blog that hits me.

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ERM……………..

I like to express my gratitude and at the same time, give -all my other lovely friends in the Willows, new Blogs to check out.

I have decided to do what I did last week and accept an award and nominate not only ten people I already follow (  the first number that came to my mind) but also to nominate you for this award too. Simply because… I can..

Ha ha! No, I jest, I jest…..

The reason will become apparent now.

The intention of this award is to encourage connectivity and support in the blogging community and to increase exposure for individual bloggers. 

BROOKE @THE UTOPIA UNIVERSE

Here is my lovely award

makeitultra4.jpg

Thank you, Brooke. I have followed you since I started blogging and when I think of you I think pure white sand, balmy weather, a Mediterranean vibe, and cocktails 😀 – the cocktail bit is my added idea of what should get the thumbs up in  Utopia.

I sometimes think that you must be telepathic because whenever I read your posts, it feels like you have tapped into my brain and drawn out something that I need to face and draw strength from.

The song that comes to mind when I think of you is this. I don’t know why but I just do.

https://vimeo.com/33468861

If you wish to accept the award:  The rules are simple:

  • Accept award or accept it as a compliment

  • Credit Award nominator

  • copy and paste award image in your post

  • Explain what the award is for – check above

  • Nominate  whoever you want

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SHOUT OUT OUT TIME – CHECK OUT THESE BLOGS. THANK YOU FOR TAKING A CHANCE ON THIS DAISY 😀

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MY  NOMINATIONS 10 OF YOU, WHO INSPIRE ME TO KEEP BLOGGING

  1. ROB

  2. LOTTIE

  3. SWETA

  4. POETURJA

  5. EDDAZ

  6. MEG

  7. JESSICA

  8. TIKEETHA T

  9. JUANSEN

  10. JASON

 

Time to get back to real life.

Saving the world, that kind of thing 😉

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Catch up with you later!

Daisy xoxoxo

 

 

A Potion for Complicated Emotion.

Moving forwards is easy to say.

Doing it though is rather dreary and I must ask is their a fixed pay?

 

Moving forwards helps take you from the now into the future.

Isn’t that better than being stuck in some outdated timed out computer?

 

Moving on helps you reconnect with family and friends.

Who knew reaching out would receive such a variety of hugs and vocal extends.

 

Moving forwards to heal the heart.

Is not easy when some one has wormed a way in and jolted it to jump start.

 

Moving on is the only way to go .

Its hard, especially when the tears refuse to flow.

 

Moving on when you still want to shake hands with your past .

Sounds mad but the heart doesn’t come with a free pass..

 

Moving on and each day will create more  distance.

Not exactly what I want but some other minds  can’t be controlled by my persistence.

 

Moving on need not mean to forget;

but it allows a space for that person to come back when they are ready to let go of their demonised, imagined debt.

* LEARN AND CARRY ON LOVING. LIFE LESSONS*

Finally,

I am trying to increase my word vocabulary so here goes: Use the word ‘selenotropism in a sentence or phrase.

“My biological make up, dictates that I can’t fail ,for like a flower, even on the darkest of nights, the moon will still shine and guide me to a state of selenotropism” ‪#‎wordoftheday‬

DAISY WILLOWS

You would think.

Today I decided to write first  and then check out Linda G Hills prompt for soCs  and find a place for the word prompt in my poem. Feeling ungoverned..

 

She has got the whole world in the grasp of both hands.

You would think she would be parading about with a  long procession  of New Orlean’s bands.

She has got a future so bright, it sets off her aura .

You would think  this would be enough to satisfy her disorder.

She  truly has it all.

Master of her destiny.

You would think she would be concerned with the ones who see the best in her shabby malarky.

Rave reviews flying about her  in great swirls.

Promises of a journey that  makes every oyster want to be that  part of a string of precious pearls.

She has got a future signed ,sealed and she has promised to deliver.

You would think one would satisfy her yearning for a sense of hedonistic pleasure.

You would think the world should  have tamed her – no  phoenix  bird rising from the ashes  to see  here.

Yet,  you see she is hungry , trapped , ogled at  and  even lustier.

There she goes strutting about  like she has it made.

What goes through her mind would probably make her   appear better suited to a romp with the Marqui de sade

There is a darkness in her that can’t be expelled 

I suspect she has tried to,

but she is constantly compelled.

Driven , fierce, ambitious and demanding to be heard.

She is that raven , gnawing at its cage with ideas of Freedom that can only come from the smartest  bird.

When will she feel her soul dripping in honey?

She knows it is not about the money. 

She can make a difference -she has already  stoked fury from her silenced foes.

Hark!

Look  at her!

How she  always comes up smelling of Roses?! 

She always comes up  the winner in the race of life’s woes.

Pleasure her and watch her laugh – she will make you seem like the only light in her dark.

You will feel her undivided attention and you will feel you have been counted and made your mark.

You have.

She is conflicted

Addicted.

Mystified by her own maledictions.

She still thinks about singing out her unpatriotic  defections.

Twinkle Twinkle little star.

She is what she is,

as much as you are who you are.

*Feeling irritated.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “long.” Use the word “long,” any definition. Enjoy!

LINDA G. HILL 

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