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ACT OF SUICIDE June 2020

OUT OF LIVES

The final demise

Can’t even

Summon up the courage to put my coat on

I know I would get in a dither over which one to wear.

I’d grab my converses

to growl at my fear –

dare it get in the way.

10 minutes

walk

to north bridge

Figure out the best place to land

deliberate if the fall will cause fatality.

II don’t want to strive to take attpents on my life

No dutch courage to tip me over

but a load of bentos

thadon’t know how to make me fall over

anymore

Alone,

Alone

alone

here with my phone

No one to call

Knocked down all ten pins

I win all the games.

I’m thrown out

N one believes I can never miss when ti comes th the kock down

Hey Mr holiday

YOu forgot your flip flops

Finally found the right size –

ah right then I’ll see you in the wind

Blood

dried

scrape

my inner thighs

Damb. I made it die

Life

everything that was

is no more

The battle of the bulge

White flag dido voice lasted four days

The demand to keep the enemy numbers down erupted in wrong strategy

Leaders often cry alone in the dark

or they contuse to rise to power

it’s all a demise

a loss of self, the truth

a departure from humanity

I think I’m nearly there

Oh lord

Fragile

I used run my own show and now Biggest low blow

The phone is live – fuse short

It feels dysfunctionality

Why do I leave as my legacy

Sorry bee -Im a travesty

Dman.

Not one penny left to see

My wedding ring is finite

Born into a shape resembling a homeless shadow

seeking a bright light

The fear

the bug flows have got me

Jah, Can have little of that grounded vibe.

I’m noting but a numvber

Take the [pills

and jump \

If I rise as I wake may I pull the life saver with me to my final; resting place

The fat is kneeding

holding me

I’m not proud to know the self I feel crumble

I’m sane by dealers who see the signs

one direction – this bitch aint benign

So alone -I can’t move – I have no hope to look after me

my daughter, my world

So goodby – bet you all happy to see the last of me.

My mother called me

My mother called me a narcissist

I delayed ringing an exorcist

Eve didn’t want to admit she was too affronted by the orange county housewife

I’ d laugh if it weren’t for the affray

the truth is I’m a direct line of self sabatageoust

my mother called me a narcissist cos i killed myself

she didn’t find it funny when i told her to go along with it

She didn’t get it.

I take up my place as a a dyed goat dressed in sheep

i wonder if I can make it .

i forget

language-so i bleat instead of weep my tears.