Harried. Hurried. Life pulls me into its vortex.
Tears drip, sealing up presents protected in pink wrapping paper.
She is growing too old, too quickly . Nauseating -left sickly.
Guilt erodes my cavernous mind -echoes dart all around.
So triste. If only I could plug in a pair of earphones so you can hear my heart’s melody- a melancholic cacophony of unequal distributed sound.
A new day and it’s time to celebrate.
Cake and food and balloons to check off the list.
Snacks, goats cheese quiche. They don’t do a version called hashish.
Slide my cell phone out, to check how many miles I’ve clocked on my fitness app. Gravity does an honorable job of conforming to what I’ve been told it should do when my phone disconnects from my hand.
Shattered glass. I scream:
No, not the screen!
Smoke ablaze, allow me to atone for my karmic debt. Soul let me be clean.
God theory – Spiritual . Analytical – my faith is still reciprocal.
Hope making up punch in the fruit aisle. Grapes ,peaches, grab a sack of bananas.
The educated children won’t remember the birthday girl if we don’t get 22 packets of individually wrapped Haribo sweets for them to take home.
Sugar rush -sweeten the crush . No huge party – with a whole class invited to practice nurse and doctors with up to date human body scanners.
Masters of writing .Deadlines.
Party time or Mommy will get stuck with the craziest fine.
Rain – divine. Only when wrapped up in a duvet in my precious bed – liken it to someone’s favorite merlot wine.
Bus. Wind. Howling and scowling. A face – a perfect reflection of the weather.
Dentistry. High priority. Teeth fixed.
Smile and show off your invisible vulnerability.
Pictures dating back to the 1920’s – Man with 1000’s of vintage cameras has a hobby, he can unfreeze time and develop older pictures into negatives. It’s all about integrity.
Pass them down to your future generations – remember those who came before us. The ones we inherited our addictions, maledictions.
Nose catches a whiff- a sense of a DNA code .
Talking to myself -creating characters in a place of puffed up, cloudy mindfulness. Not so sure that inherited gene falls under the category of serious afflictions.
Not crazy perhaps a mere case of unharnessed creativity.
What is so wrong with riding on an elated bull of mimicry?
Smokescreen – less hazy. £100 bill to fix my technological , grave -sadistic error in clumsiness.
Would you rather pay £1000 for a new mac laptop or £49 ?
Ex-navy man, stop skirting around the gravy line, drop it on me like an anchor. In my world money is your pay packet. All I have is a sense of running out of time.
Rabbits late. Missed the date , bounced cheque couldn’t secure my delivery bundle, all inclusive with the hottest corporate communication and logistics stork delivery enterprise.
Maybe next year I will miss the pill.
Phones for you.
Warranty does not cover intoxicated phones.
Why did you have to get giddy and go bonkers at the mention of a few smartie infused cocktails, for a party happening at 4pm ?
This is festive stuffing prepped for nightmares. 1000’s of drones willing to commit mass suicide – I don’t think bee heaven has parties streamed with foam slides and glow in the dark stick tones.
Deaf – no jam.
Talking in my ear. Three wise men chasing a star .
All I need is one competent man.
Pass me a fan. English turns into piggish.
Yes, the laptop is exactly what I need.
Writer? -one of the things I do.
Student debt. This mute starts to laugh .
Their bombastic moves to persuade me leaves me with the taste of lead. I’m tempted to walk out of here as a woman converted to the Amish.
My specs are more concerned with software.
Don’t make me use my collateral.
Figures ruminating around my mind – 400 – 500.
More fad songs.
Inside, Hurricane Matthew remnants rattle Mount cranium. Hurtling through the air – a cow passes by me in flight, with a courteous: moo.
This is my despair.
The carefree and serene look is the only bargain I am looking for.
Time is zig zagging up behind me in crocodile form. He has that tick-tocking swag -his tail -swish swashes-ear drums deafened.
Mindstate? Ready to light the cannon ball.
I am that bemused.
I will give you £60 worth of Morrisons grocery shopping if you stop selling to a seller – trying to service a servicer
Yadda yadda yadda. Green is grasser.
Too much fodder . Where’s the verbal shredder?
Recycle your position.
You can choose to not tick: employment occupation – Ass wiper.
Sit down. Take it all in. Funds ready to transfer. Card amped to stick it in and spread that green cum from within.
Hand wash only.
I’m thinking my accepted friend V has an addiction .
I satisfied him last night. Friends do that caring thing.
All week I have had him in and out. He doesn’t even remember most of his hits.
I spent most of Wednesday washing out bloody sheets, stained with a not so virginal hole.
Sinful statement – let’s sing a hymn for her cheery soul.
Disease seems not far from our midst.
I need to contain it and stop passing it on and encouraging sharing.
Vee – I don’t want to lose you to a pair of sharp tools.
Poodle-haired lady bitch behind me – tit tittering.
Leave empty-handed. Priorities in order.
Not High street fashionable but then again I have always been drawn to disorder.
Time to leave consumer society hill.
I’ve already taken a shot to the shoulder with over a hundred pound bill.
Alcohol arises from its slumber. Coughing,cunning and conniving.
Remember next Thursday. All day Worskshops on how to handle stress, delivered to four back to back classes of teens in year 10.
Safety zone. A place I have to call my own.
Look at her face – full of delight. Illuminati – unbelievers.
The power of love and humanity – cuts deep – penetrates the core of the bone.
Tearing open presents. Lighting candles. Rule of thumb. Forget the inside out rule.
Hey, I’m a Mom – it’s cool. My Family praise me -a palm leaf sways- cool wind.
Time to break away from the frenetically paced fever.
Not a cracker dares to show its face after seeing what I have just pulled off.
Top draw. classy.
Good night. sleep tight.
No time to study or do any work.
Always have to tidy up.
Wash my makeup off. Comfortable pajamas .
I hit my bed ready to recharge. Refill my cup.
Madness, the Cure, the Pixies, Red Hot Chili Peppers.
I made it through another day: no breakdowns, hospitalizations,no close encounters with mind-bending lepers.
Don’t mind if I treat myself to what I fancy?
No need to answer.
I don’t listen to pessimists swimming in a sea of ever mutating, nuclear Cancer.
Last post on this topic for a month. To day I’m exploring one of the oldest religions that sounds like rastafarianism but clearly to my ignorant mind is not . It is in fact, Zoroastrianism. This religion has it’s origin in Persia or Iran as we know it today.
The creator is wholly good. His name is Ahura Mazda – ‘lord of wisdom’. I’m not sure if he ever endorsed the car company Mazda. It is a possibility. Stranger things have happened in this life we live in.
SPONSORED BY ( this is not a fact just a joke)
He is beyond wise, he is everything that evil and chaos is not. No snake is gonna get away lying to this God dude.
Being a God can be hard work so even a this dude needs a bit of help. He uses his seven creations- the divine spirits.
Spenta Mainyu is the Ahura’s favorite spirit because she is his agent and does his will.
If you have watched ‘Allo Allo’, Spenta is this character:
Like all good stories ,Ahura needs a nemesis. He has the ultimate nemesis his evil twin – Arihman.
He is beneath (pun) him. Ahura will never accept that his dark twin is his equal.
So the two are constantly locked in a good old fashioned battle of Good versus Evil.
Somehow Spenta- the secret agent is always in the middle of these two’s little spats. It is a mystery how or what the exact relationship is amongst the three.
Oh, another small fact – Ahura Mazda – also created humans whom he gave free will. I think that could have been one of the days he was having a bit of an off day in his judgements. Just take a look around at our beautiful world or what is left of it.
Us , humans were granted with a massive responsibility to buck up , keep the world in a state of order.
Denounce all evil thoughts and behaviours known as druj -or the dark-side as many of us know it.
They did this by only speaking good things, doing good things, being pretty fucking good- not the best but just –
good enough– this goodness is called asha
Evil twin constantly tries to shake things up and rebels. He’s like
” Humans? Why so serious? C’mon lets have a party.”
” How do you know you are being good if you have never tried living in chaos? Maybe the true good lies in chaos” – this is a cunning tactic.
This is all hearsay of course. So don’t quote me on the exact words.
Mazda found or created this highly good dude called – Zoroaster., who went on to hire a bunch of humans to do good shit. This was Mazda’s ultimate weapon against his twin.
‘Good will prevail’is the main belief of these optimistic folk.
Mazda, like many before and after him ,wanted to create a perfect world- a Utopia,I guess. I could argue that what one thinks is an idea of a perfect world is not necessarily what everyone else thinks is the perfect world.
I’m just putting that out there.
Just to be sure that Good had a better chance of defeating evil, Mazda had a couple more tricks up his sleeve.
He created an invisible spiritual world which contained a perfect being. This was meant to fool his evil twin.
He also came up with a pretty potent collection of words known as the ‘Ahunaver’ prayer which blasted his twin into back into the darkness. No light – nothing.
I’m tired after all this work. Finally Mazda created a tangible form to his spiritual world
He’s not gonna risk taking any more bullshit and so, the bull is created as the primal animal.
What about us humans. Never fear.
He may be weary but he reveals his perfect spiritual being and turns it into a real life human being.
His idea of making us humans decide to side with bad or evil completely absolves him of any duty or responsibility. Crafty or what?
Did you think that his tricks worked on the greatest trickster of them all? His twin.
This is the bit where his nemesis got really pissed off , he has licked his wounds and recovered and murders the bull and the human. He has a few gifts to bring to us.
All wrapped up with their own name tags.
Quite a generous bloke is this nemesis of Mazda ( who may or may not be sponsored by Mazda -the car brand)
Zoroastrianism religion give us personal responsibility to do good and act morally
Human virtues: to practice daily include: Truthfulness, Loyalty,Tolerance, forgiveness,respect for ones Elders and keeping promises. All our choice
Human vices :not to practice are Anger,Arrogance,vengefulness,bad language and Greed
If you follow this religion you will be judged twice- yes, twice. Once when we die and the other is the last judgement.
People can redeem themselves and have the choice to act morally in the after life.
Only when good supersedes evil will a new saviour in the world be born –Saoshyant to revive the world.
So lets recap
Our creator is 100% good.
But, people can see both evil and good
No evil can come from Good
So, evil needs to a completely separate creation to the 100% good God
We have choice. We are encouraged to help our good creator challenge the bad and the evil in the world.
That is it until May 2016. Beliefs will continue to follow with ‘the rise of ancient and classical beliefs.’
See you then 🙂