Blog Archives

Marching forward

Okay, so I have had a day to chill and do what I want. The problem with shutting down and taking myself away from the world is the motivation to get back in it.

Am I  alone here?

 I lost interest  in doing the The a-z challenge – Brutal honesty as always folks.  It’s not because I don’t love my animal friends. It’s just something I need to work out in my mind  of how I am going to tackle it.


I’ve not given up entirely.

I woke up later than usual and I’m thinking to myself.

I have lost my vision.

I have lost the ability to write/type. 

All creativity is gone.

I’m scrolling through my emails.

SHOUT OUT TO ALL NEW FOLLOWERS THANK YOU!  I’m not usually so fucking morbid.

Yeah, so, I am scrolling through my emails thinking

do the  a-z challenge it is something to write about

Then another thought,

No, don’t be so flaky, Daisy. The challenge is in  addition to what you write not a reason to write

I am waiting for my coffee to cool down and am still in

the ‘aaaaarhgh I have to wake up’ zone.


I see a comment on my Daisy in  the willows welcome page. This obviously intrigues me.

VERY HAPPY TO ACCCEPT MY NEW AWARD   from itsgoodtobecrzysometimes

No not the Liebster award


The versatile blogger award

but a kick ass

Spirit animal kick ass award –

(I am truly grateful for ALL  awards and shout outs . )

I feel like I have been shocked back into this world, out of a indifferent coma, by a defibrillator. It does feel like I have taken a bullet to the head.



The sun is

blazing , burning bright.

It feels like the world is giving me small signs to stay the course.

Keep on my path and not lose hope.

Okay, I took one day off. I did a kick ass gym session today. Doubled the energy and upped the momentum.

Grey skies have turned blue.

I have been blessed with help from my family to let me have some away time  from all humans. I’ve got people in my corner supporting me.

I have all of you supporting me.

I may have been out of action for a day but I still have people who read my blog.

New  flowers appear  every day, interested in my  blog!


These are all blessings. I must finish this a-z challenge. I must continue to get my shit down. No matter how lame I think  the content is. So here it is.

Today #FollowGreatFootsteps is embedded in this, my  FLEUR SCENTED POSTS  .

So here is my quote:

“Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though sometimes it is hard to realize this. For the world was built to develop character, and we must learn that the setbacks and grieves which we endure help us in our marching onward.” -HENRY FORD

I’m back  –‘one perfect queen’ is the title  for my  a-z challenge – small cheat but  I’m using my creativity. 😀

Thank you everyone for all your supportive words.

Me, the weed has turned away from the darkness and lifted my head up  towards the sun . I am the phoenix bird of the flowers. I re bloom.




Today,I’m kind of moving away from my conventional idea of what my animal theme and what  an animal is supposed to be. I have been pretty much any animal you can get.

Party animal

Sick animal

Angry animal

Pregnant animal

Savage animal

Abused animal

Wild animal

you name it I have been it.

The time when I have most felt like an animal was when I couldn’t speak. Don’t get me wrong, I understood everything that was going on around me.


I knew the parlez and slang too.

I just lost my voice. I didn’t even have a new voice to replace my wo-ma-nimal voice.

I think my affinity with animals is deep because I have been thrown in cells (mainly of the  police kind) .

I’ve been shipped off to private hospitals to  be treated and be case studies with my crazy animal genes.

Those who know me -will get this.

Today. ME.

Who  am  I today?


An empowered, feminist who wears her heart on her sleeve.


Would I describe myself as an animal?

and if so why ?

The answer is yes. I am probably more in tune with more animals than people because animals are naturally sentient beings. So are humans but have you seen how in humane humans have become/

I’ve felt what it is like not to have free will -if you can get my meaning.

I’ve had my freedom taken away and now I have taken it back.


Today I’m buzzing.

I’m going ape shit crazily happy .


I didn’t think I would see this week through for various reasons.

Today, I went back to my roots.

The very  start of my journey in the vast, exciting and terrifying world of volunteering with mental health charities.

Hope charity@ Caldredale Recovery college  was where I got my first break and my first GIFT – check it  out HERE.  This was where I was shown how to  and began to believe in myself .

Finally, I began to believe that  I could go on to do things that I never even dreamed of doing.  My prize was hope and passion and drive. I met a  great bunch of people.

After doing some training and work with Hope , I had the opportunity to do a couple of  workshops centred around  stigma and mental health with the healthy minds open minds project . I have loved  being a small part of this project.

I enjoyed being a part of HEALTHY MINDS RADIO SHOW

I have found our how  committed I can be.

Recently, I have  been on several  challenging training sessions, geared at  getting me to think  “out side the box “and gain more perspective and insight into facilitating peer led support groups with healthy minds.

It’s not an easy role.

In fact it is one of the most difficult roles.

I’m currently  waiting to go through my personal development file to see which direction I will go with Healthy minds.  A well established and awesome charity.

Today ,I got to do more training with Hope charity, it was lovely to be around old friends. It was great to see how we had all grown and where we were up to.  It was like coming home from an adventure.


I am so lame and I don’t care.  I am going to share this with you because I have fucking earned it

TAH-DAH. I am officially on board with the NHS (National health service in the U.K.) volunteer books.

This is my  equivalent to a  VIP pass to a Celeb after party or  the promo badge all areas access to  a worldwide indie movie festival. This is what this feels to me.  A  small example of a measurement of commitment and effort..


  Some people may go so what?

I go what?!

Here is a bit of insight into what this means to me.

I came from South Africa  to the U.K.when I was 18 years old.  Worked and lived in France, Barcelona  and Miami for a bit and then established myself in the U.K. permanently when I was 21/22 years old.

I worked and had a rewarding job in the travel and tourism industry.

I hit all my targets.

I got sent on training events.

As I began to grow into my role, I was  sent to conferences in places like Bulgaria, to establish connections and represent the  brand  of Travel care, (  a part of the defunct  co-operative travel group- now owned by Thomas Cook)

…….and then I got ill.

images (1)



I’ve been fighting my illness for over a decade to get back to some level  of the success I experienced in my Travel career. It has been the longest drop down the rabbit hole and the climb up has been

dirty. ,



and pretty fucking  messy.


I’ve studied  my ass off- I didn’t think anything else could top  getting my BA degree,

  • apart from having my Bella B

  •  me weeks away from getting married

  • being mega successful in a career

  •  travelling – of course.

  • Oh, and having my child taken out of foster care and placed in my full time care again without the local authorities in my life.

It has taken me  just over a decade to get to the place where I feel like I belong. I feel worthy again

 I feel like  I am back in my natural habitat.



I’ve worked hard to get to this point. And I am damn proud of myself. Somebody has to be.

I could have done a post on another type of animal . But in all honesty I have  got to type down what is in my heart.

The queen of my mind is also the queen of my  heart. I know so. I live in my mind and body.

download (2)


So today. I’m having a huge party in my head. I’m sharing it ` with the entire blogo-sphere that I have something  tangible that symbolises what my worth means to me again.

I will not lose my worth again.

So that is it.

I’m amped for another exciting project that I have heard about and will definitely  be going to it next week. I don’t want to say too much. I don’t want to jinx anything. My creative side has  been stirred and shaken  and I have ideas.

I also get  the opportunity to bounce ideas off other like minded people.

So I am not not going to miss any possible  opportunities to live and be awesome and help others find a sense of worth and see their own awesomeness .

 I always thought I would be the animal who would never be able to live in the wild again. I would need to be kept in a reserve of some kind.


A Daisy may be a weed – but  it still breathes. It is an earthling. – you, me, animals,fish , spiders birds,plants and trees -all need oxygyn to survive.

While my heart still pumps blood and  oxygen  around my body and into my lungs. I aint going to give up.


I know I am bigging myself up.

Can I talk the talk? Type the type?

Well -obviously…


Can I walk the walk?

Watch this space.

I have another shot at life and I am living it.

The ultimate challenge on earth. Thanks to all those who read my posts xxx

you are all fucking amazing, supportive and read my shit and then like it.

Happy weekend..

Some one  mentioned   a meet and greet when you grow up at THE SIMPLE LIFE this weekend.

I will be bringing the party spirit.

Daisy shares a tip :D

EXERCISE TIP# After summoning up all the motivation you can muster to do a dance work out. If like me you do your sessions at home. Don’t do it with the  clothes dryer on.  Heat and slippery floors may equal an out of action body for 6 weeks.  You do not want to hit the floor (mat)  until YOU want to. 

Off I go ho ho ho ho ho ho……