Blog Archives

Getting to know me

5 am start to get shit done. Coffee is my greatest ally. Okay so for writing 101  we had to write a list of things we like, things we wish for and things we have learned. What I  intend to do with this list is use it as a prompt to create situations, develop plot and character for the NaNoWriMo 50 000 word challenge for the month of November. I’m also killing the two proverbial ‘birds with one stone. Day three of NaNoWriMo and I’m up to 1701 words. I do not know what the finished product will be but I’m enjoying the process.

Here is mine :

Things I Like:

  • I like reading

  • I like dancing

  • I like music

  • I like being fashion

  • I like  all you can eat pancakes for 5 rand -( takes me back to childhood: After every beach session with my mates in South Africa we  would stop off  at this pancake cafe,and eat the thickest and biggest pancakes imaginable. We had competitions  to see who could eat the most. My record is a proud 8)

  • I like going to  events festivals, gigs, theatres

  • I like to be accepted by my friends

  • I like to be secure in my surroundings

  • I like to look good

  • I like to be helpful

  • I like to do good

  • I love my  bed

  • I like vaping

  • I like sunny days

  • I like to be around un pretentious people

    I like conversations with my daughter

I Wish:

  • I wish I had learned to play a musical instrument properly

  • I wish I had not wasted my time getting people to like me

  • I wish I had proper  sight vision from a young age

  • I wish my Aunt had not died from cancer

  • I wish a person close to me  would stop hearing voices and get better

  • I wish I had an engaging personality

  • I wish I had more self-belief

  • I wish I was not so self-critical

  • I wish my Grandpa had not died

  • I wish I had stayed in Miami

  • I wish I  had a closer bond with my Dad

  • I wish I could afford to go on holiday

  • I wish that I was naturally thin

  • I wish my Gran did not have Alzheimers and Dementia

  • I wish I had just enough money to do more of the things I enjoy –theatre –gigs festival travel

I’ve Learned:

I’ve learned to question my thoughts

I’ve learned to let people talk before jumping in

I’ve learned that drugs and alcohol are not my thing

I’ve learned that most people I know suffer from some form  of mental illness in their life –(this prompted me to think about a character who lashes out at people to hide a horrible secret- Her mental health issues)

I’ve learned the value of true love and self-respect

I’ve learned not to get too upset if people don’t like me (  yet again great inspiration fro developing all round characters with shades of dark and light)

I’ve learned   how to not self-harm

I’ve learned that hard work pays off

I’ve learned about faith and spirituality and religion and  developed my own  belief  system– (devil-prompt-  aaaaaaaargh what ? The devil bit was my  teenage obsession phase with satanic cult books. I never became a Satanic but I have always had a thirst for knowledge and I have a rather consistent habit of being drawn to ‘dark side’

I’ve learned to look people in the eyes when I speak and when they speak with me

I’ve learned that I am a compassionate person

I’ve learned about unconditional love

I’ve learned not to think that not all laughter is aimed at me

I’ve learned to fight  and stand up for myself (something I didn’t have the tools to do when I was a teenager. ( I got into one physical fight in my life and I didn’t even know it was going to happen. In my drug taking hey day I was accused of stealing friends mobile phones for drugs. The true thief was a so called drug buddy and boyfriend who used me as his unknowing decoy to steal shit for his habit. Who was the fall guy/woman?  Me. I was so addled with drugs and anorexia one punch knocked me flat out. People wanted a  fight but I don’t think physical violence is way to ‘sort things out’. Now, out witting some one with words is  powerful a message and   more my thing.