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Toxic positivity culture

Most of us are aware that suicide attempts are on the rise at an explosive rate.

We all don’t want to see or hear someone who thinks the only way out of life is taking their own life.

We are told to talk about our feelings. Get it all out & call for a chat if we need anything.

People have to get on with their lives.

What if the help they are advised to seek out isn’t there or doesn’t help?

What about our ethical stance or views about people who want to end their lives?

Can we become open to challenging our views and reasons for helping people without being able to have a lasting impact on those people who still have to live with the aftermath of wanting to die?

Of course ,we are humans with complex emotions & at times deep compassion & empathy. We want to help or fix other people.

How do you feel about

Someone with a degenerative disease such as MS who has lost her soulmate & wants to end Life?

Or a man with a family to protect who is struggling financially & can’t see a way out either through shame or pride to seek out help or because they refuse to live in poverty so takes his life so his family can live on his Life insurance?

What can you do to make a positive long lasting change in their mind set or circumstances?

Does it soothe our conscience

We can admonish we have done the right thing

Acts of Altruism?

What about a teenager with body issues, relationship problems, a person.

Who sees no way out?

What if the places we signpost him to get help can’t or doesn’t help?

Well.. at least we tried to be a good person..

Instinctively we feel that it would be wrong to not want to help.

We live in a society where we are bound by outdated traditions, people who believe rhat by giving a person a poster can guide a person to change their perspective .

I believe the quality of life should matter more than the quantity.

I also believe that a teenager or a man in serious debt may be able to find guidance and be able to deal with the desire to die.

When it comes to illnesses I watched my own grandmother become an entity merely existing because that is what. society says we should do. Keep her alive.

Keep people alive even if that life is in a care home, unable to speak, move.

We don’t have enough resources to help people in state care homes to signpost these people to places where they can have a chance to rethink how they can live with a sense of purpose.

I’ve seen people I love live on a “leash” tied to life for what? other peoples peace of mind?

If we can’t get the resources to help people see a way out must they suffer their entire mortal life in mental anguish & physical torture?

What gives life meaning?

Purpose?

Finding a way to grow, achieve happiness – evolve as we have been designed to as humans?

We were born to live in our physical bodies and create a life worth living. To be able to say at the end of our lives that we died knowing for what purpose we had lived.

Pets & neglect

I thought today would be a good time to get a bit closer to home with the animals that we choose to adopt into our family.

Here is a word

NEGLECT

and another

ABUSE

What does this mean to you?

What does it bring to mind?

Something deliberate?

Sometimes  these words conjure up images and words of

  • Shooting

  • Stabbing

  • Setting an animal on fire

  • Stop-Animal-Cruelty-Dont-Be-Sorry-Do-Something.jpg

 

A lot of animal neglect may not be deliberate.

It can be as something as simple as forgetting to put out fresh clean water for a pet or a farm animal.

There is a strong link between animal abuse and violence. My ex-partner was violent with his dog.

 

Is there a relationship between domestic abuse and animal abuse?

When I sought out my local woman centre about the violent relationship I was in. I had to do score test to find out which band or stage of severity my abuse I was in.

One of the questions was if my ex-partner ever hurt an animal. Animal abuse

This is one of the four predictors that may indicate that a partner will be violent to a child or a partner.

I remember a long time ago, I can’t remember where I was living but there was a man who was always abusing his dog. I don’t know what he did to it but the animal was clearly distressed. So much so I reported it.

So can animal abuse give some indication towards abuse to people?

Social workers /professionals are supposed to be trained to look at an animal’s living conditions in a household and gauge how they are treated to indicate if they’re some kind of clear break down in a family. There can be many reasons for this.

  • Poor mental health

  • Unable to have Empathy

  • Substance misuse

  • Animal hoarding

Animal neglect does give a better picture of any child /Domestic violent abuse that may occur in a household.

It seems like a no brainer and it is..

 

MEMORY ALERT

I remember when I was about 4/5 years old. I was playing with my ‘My little pony’ kingdom and the kitten we had at that time came to say hi. I don’t know what I was thinking but there was a ribbon on the floor- the memory is a bit blurred.

I tied the ribbon around my kitten’s neck and then tied it to the leg of the table my pony kingdom was on and I kept on tightening the ribbon until my kitten was hanging.

Something in my brain shattered. I realised if I didn’t do something my kitten would die because of me.  I scrambled to get my kitten free and I was in tears- horrified that I had nearly killed my kitten.

My kitten was fine by the way.

What if my mother hadn’t been a mad cat/animal lover like me?

What if she hadn’t taught me to love and respect animals?

Just a thought I guess….

She doesn’t know about this event.

 

So is animal abuse normal in children?

This can indicate that a child is a high-risk youth. Children from violent homes of abuse and neglect can act out abuse on animals.

I don’t know what this says about me.

Was I acting out on some unconscious level what was going on in my home at that point?

Possibly.

I think for me what is important is my instinct kicked in and I knew this was wrong and I never wanted or tried to hurt an animal again.

Some experts would agree that intervening early with a  child at risk of developing abusive traits can be more therapeutic in stopping the cycle of violence.

Why should I get involved in reporting animal abuse if it is not my business? How can I possibly be making any difference at all?

It is about looking at the bigger issues. If you report to the police/animal protection society of any abuse that you see, then this will be recorded on the crime database and it can lead to investigations and prosecuting dangerous criminals, keeping them away from society-ie in  prison.

 People who act out on crimes such  as

  • Damaging property

  • Violence against humans

  • Drug and Disorderly offences

can all be linked to animal abuse

WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP? I hear you ask

 

http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/abuse_neglect/tips/cruelty_action.html?credit=web_id83147831

Report all animal abuse. Animal abuse can indicate that there is something seriously wrong with an individual. It is not normal or acceptable.

 

The more we as a community alert police and the law to animal abuse, it becomes a clear message that this is an issue that needs to become more of a priority. It is a stand we take- that we will not accept to live in a  violent community. Law enforcers will need to become more serious about how they deal with this crime because we won’t ignore it anymore.

The result will be a safer community for our families.

 

Confessions of an Animal lover

The A-Z challenge starts tomorrow.

Oh, zeeeeeeeeeeee excitement.

I’m probably going to have to put a pause on my ‘Beliefs’ posts, which in a way, I’m actually dreading because I love being silly and writing comically.

 My theme is animals. I’ve always been more compassionate to animals than most humans.I don’t know what it is that connects me to our earthling friends.

(Singing)

“I like big cats and I cannot lie…”

This may sound bordering on psychopathic tendencies ,but I think the connection was made when I was about 3/4 years old. I was playing with  ‘my little ponies’ in my bedroom – remember them?

Our kitten came into my bedroom. I spotted   a piece of string on the floor and for some (evil) reason I tied the string around my kitten’s nec, it was too short.

I nearly hung my kitten, as soon as I saw it struggling ,I untied it then proceeded to burst into to tears.

I’m not evil.

Kids do experiment.

It’s not funny, it is going to be horrific, I expect many of you may not even read the posts because you can’t bear to listen or read or see an animal suffering or abused.

Don’t turn your eyes away from something because it upsets you. I expect to learn a lot. I hope you will take the time to raise your own awareness to all our earthling friends. Be brave enough to take the time to read what abuse/disrespect so many have been through.

I’m their voice for the month of April. I’m going into serious mode. If anyone has read my

“I  love cats and all our earthling friends. I have  nearly had massive fistie cuffs with people about my passion for animals.  I’m not trying to sell anything. Rest at ease, soldier.”

Daisy Willows

 I can laugh at religion( some people can’t). I can’t laugh or ignore animal abuse and neglect  though some people can.

It’s a good job we are all different hey?