“I know what is its like to be afraid of your own mind and body ” UNKNOWN #FollowGreatFootsteps
WHY HAVE I CHOSEN THIS QUOTE?
It’s that time of month. I’ve stepped on the dreaded scales and put on weight. Remember I have an eating disorder. Logic/science dictates that when I am on my period that I may have fluid retention.
I’ve been researching about weight gain and I’m on day 3 now and I should be weighing less according to reliable Google. 😀
I’m sure I go through this every fucking month but I have selective amnesia. My mind has compelled me to think the weight gain has nothing to do with my period. I’ve just got fatter!
My partner has to live with me and my obsession over weight. He always tells me my weight will go down -it always does. I want to rip his gonads off him when he says this because my mind is fucking with me, my clothes are tight.
I exercise daily.
I shouldn’t put on weight.
I’ve lost control. My eating disorder rules me for the next 7 days.
Isn’t that like how long it took to create the world?
Periods and creating the world are pretty epic ,monumental moments.
What if it is true weight gain?
I guess you have fathomed out that I am not a happy Daisy. These are the times I miss being so underweight because I don’t have to worry about my periods. I don’t get them. I don’t want to be anorexic again.
I WANT THE SCALES TO GO DOWN TO MY SAFE WEIGHT ZONE AGAIN!
Is it too much to ask?
Posted on Apr 3, 2016, in INSPIRED BY MY MUSE, WRITE TO RECOVER and tagged Eating Disorders, Emotions, GO THORUGH ALL OF THESE, Here's what I think, INSPIRED BY MY MUSE, Thoughts, Well being, When I was young, Write to create, WRITE TO RECOVER. Bookmark the permalink. 20 Comments.