Keeping it real

My beliefs haven’t changed. I do believe in the content of my posts. I just want to say that I also have shit days when I don’t feel so accepting of my looks and body and the rest of all that is me. I also want validation through superficial social media websites. The last two days have been pretty fucking miserable. Usually exercise, blogging, interacting with blogs, volunteering, working on new projects and finding ways to be positive with one or two of ‘mothers little helpers; help shift the doom and gloom.

 

Got to give me a break.

Talk and write the truth. This usually works. Write -freestyle it and post. Don’t check if someone may or may not like what I have to say. Minimum editing. None if possible. Small spell check. Hit the publish button, making sure I have attached all files titled ‘vacuous negative energy’ to it, blast it into the blogosphere -somewhere- all the words unravel and collide with an Infinitum of other unread words.

They may or may not get read. Usually, people who enjoy jigsaw puzzles get these kinds of posts.  Guess what? I hate jigsaws!

Bit blunt?  Sure?

 I guess the whole aim of this post is to free myself -Let it all hang out.

So, yeah. I’ not happy and self-accepting all the time. I work at it and I don’t give up. I’m not one dimensional.

I try.

I try to give Happiness and Self-acceptance a secure bosom to lie their heads against. I don’t want doubt, negativity and self hate to  nestle it’s way onto my bosom and go

“Oh look tits! We are gonna suck every last drop of Happiness and Self-acceptance out of them until they a flaccid, wrinkled and bruised.” 

Villainous laughter like “mwahwhwhahahaha” or some other shit. Then they take my head full of shit and slam dunk it. Yes, those three.

They will make me think that me accepting myself and being happy can’t happen outside my mind. They will try and repress the independence of my native tongue. They will find a way to make my rediscovered language seem like a myth– folklore…

It never happened.

There were never words such as Happiness and Self-acceptance. There was never a language that was not approved by them. 

This is why I won’t stop writing empowering posts. Like ‘body image awareness’. Yes, I agree when I try and speak this language, sometimes, I feel like an idiot, a foreigner. I quickly lose my confidence  when I pronounce  it wrong. Use it in the ‘wrong’ context. Oh, how quick my enthusiasm to live freely is so quickly caught up in a net -stenched  in mockery and jibes. HOW DARE I? 

DARE OR TRUTH? I DO BOTH.

I fight to be happy -truly happy- no superficial bullshit

I fight to love my body and me- no superficial bullshit

Always keeping it real

About Daisy Willows

'Words are my everything' - Jon Wayne . A writer of poetry, stories, stage scripts, fiction, border line poetry & freestyle works, Music reviews, Guest Features/interview & shout outs. She is also passionate about raising anti-stigma & awareness for Mental Health. A trained co-facilitator in Wellness Recovery Action plan by Mary Ellen Copeland Natasha goes by many moniker names-Daisy Willows, bahtuhkid, GOAT2Bdazee. She has had a colourful life. Travelled. Natasha co-owns a second-hand clothing & accessories business -La Bella Bijoux Ltd Natasha was born in South Africa & is a French national. She currently resides in the UK Natasha Bodley holds a postgraduate in the Humanities. A BA in Myth in the Greek and Roman worlds & Advanced creative writing. She also holds a Foundation degree in Acting performance. She is currently working on her first novel (semi-autobiographical creative non-fiction). She has published one short story on Amazon called 'Number one' Connect with Natasha Collaborate with Natasha & feel free to Communicate her too. Light, Peace & Love!

Posted on 2016-02-19, in MY BRAIN -MY THOUGHTS and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. People tell me all the time that both my blog and tweets are inspirational. It amuses me wildly as I often believe that I have written a blog that is anything but, yet still they say they’re inspired. I came to the conclusion long ago that the most inspiring thing in the world is truth. If it comes from the heart, it inspires. x

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Hmm. I’ve had days like this, but I’m a little more self-concious than you. You seem to be so comfortable in your own in skin. I have a long way to go..

    Anyway.. I just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the Liebster Award. It’s a small gesture but I love your blog so you can check it out here: http://curiousqueendom.com/2016/02/18/liebster-award/

    Like

  3. I’m a firm believer in “faking it until I make it” (well……………for SOME things haha). I don’t any of us are truly confident and love ourselves FULL TIME. We all struggle with anxiety and insecurity and self-doubt and even a bit of disappointment in ourselves from time to time. My personal goal is to kick those feelings in the crotch as soon as I can and force myself to pretend to be confident and force myself to find ways to love myself and my body until I REALLY internalize it. It’s difficult. And it’s a constant process.

    Your post reminds me of this video which was all over my facebook feed yesterday. It may be helpful:

    Like

  4. Advanced Research Technology

    Had to chuckle with that first line of “embracing ourselves with love and shit.” Well, which one is it? ..or both perhaps?
    We are what we are and we should embrace it. It is just a stage. If we sit back and analyze it, each moment is just a stepping stone into the next level of awareness… if we allow ourselves to go there. Oh, we like one particular stone. Well, guess what? We can step on that particular stone however many times we want. I sincerely hope that at some point this gets boring.
    Anyway, the way I see it, there is nothing we cannot change about ourselves, absolutely nothing. Some things may need a deeper approach, but all things can change with a little awareness and realization.
    That is why it is important to accept ourselves the way we are. It sets us up to accept the person we soon will be.

    Liked by 1 person

    • love and good shit hahahhaha – you have such a way with words 😀 but that it just it. You have nailed it on the head. We must accept ourselves today in his moment to help us accept the person we will become in the future. Interesting you use the word analyse. I think that is the one thing I do with everything and the outcome is always the same – unhelpful and boring. That is where I lose my grip and slip off the stone. Over thinking can be a persons demise .You know what I hate the most? Is I worry too much if people don’t like me. I hate the idea that someone can like me and unlike me and I know all the quotes and I know not everyone can like me or I can like everything. I try . That is my point- Sometimes we do stupid things, say awful things to retaliate and I know that I only wrote what I did because I was offended. I would love to say I’m sorry and know if that person really meant the words they typed. I guess some things are best left in the past. I should be happy knowing in my heart that people try and hurt each other when they are hurting….. Oh dear… I feel this has is the beginning of a totally new post. Some thigns are too raw, you know? I guess I am aware that just like I can sting people with my words and not mean it o it can be the other way. Is this where I level up 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      • Advanced Research Technology

        I can feel your mind exploding from here. Better get to that next post!
        What I meant by analyze, is to spiritually analyze, not mentally analyze. Mentally analyzing will make us drive ourselves silly.
        To spiritually analyze we step back from the physicality of the moment and become the observer of it. What led us here? What was it’s purpose? What are we to learn from it? How was it’s placement in our lives beneficial to growth?
        This is the seer state. It’s a meditative state that calms us and makes us one with the events happening around us. It tells us that everything happens for a purpose. When we align with that purpose, we keep taking the ladder of life higher and ever higher.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Never thought of it like that. Thanks 😊😊

        Like

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