‘The fields of panic’ – a 639 word novel by Daisy Willows
OH MY POOR GOLLY GOSH! (that sounds so lame- bear with me)
I have only just seen in my inbox that I have signed up for Blogging 201 and Writing 101! I’m obviously thrilled to bits but it is the 2nd of November and I have not wrote one single word for Nanowrimo yet !
Life has a dreadful habit of getting in the way. I’m not including important people in my life although they can take up well spent time too. I refuse to give in or give up. Need a powerful inspiring song
Although the above song does make me feel more like a machine.
This may be a teeny tiny better
– It resonates more with my topic of the day. It is rather- no terribly cheesy though….
I don’t know if it is just little old moi but I have tragic, disabling thoughts of my capacityand my ability to write well. I should be really inspired since I got a damn good result for my final 30 credit module of – ‘Advanced creative writing’ at uni. I get panic attacks ( perhaps I am slightly dramatising this) about writing for the monthly article in the ‘Healthy minds’ newsletter. I’m always rather shocked when people think my content is great! I know my writing is not great in the sense that writing an article for the top newspaper would be. However, praise is praise right?
I have these expectations that because I identify myself as a writer I should be banging out whopper stories and cracking posts- daily. Does anyone do this? I can’t write a credible short story of 200- 2500 in say, one day. I would need a lot of editing to make sure the story develops and reads as something I would want to put to the public.
Life this week consists of:
- Household shopping and looking for my graduation dress ( my gradation is this Friday)
- A dentist appointment and a catch up with an important individual
- Week 6 of WRAP – three hour session – and updating it on to my WRAP page
- Paying monthly bills ( I am rather retro and old fashioned when I pay my bills- no on-line shenanigans for me)
- Actively working with my daughters pre school to get her out of full time nappies
- buying a new mirror on a super tight budget ( I only broke my fave mirror in my bedroom a couple of days ago) NO I AM NOT SUPERSTITIOUS ABOUT THIS AT ALL (I don’t know if I am being sarcastic or not about this)
- doing Blog 201 and Writing 101
- getting anything down to hit my word target with Nanowrimo
- Graduation in Manchester ( most of the time will be spent trying to find a hat for photos)
- getting out the way of my hubby to be – He is currently re decorating our home
- Going to visit my cousin (who is ill at moment)
- Getting my hair done
- mindful of not spending too much dosh due to wedding fund
- Normal work
It might not look like a lot, however, if you add into the mix the pressure I put on myself to get everything perfect and having my finances in order, along with the pressure of finding a dress that makes me look -va va voom- in a non photo shopped way. Add this to the 101 million Bipolar led thoughts telling me to have it all done RIGHT NOW- YESTERDAY!
So, in my head I have it all figured out- actually I don’t. I am not much of a planner. I am more impulsive and spontaneous.
Wish me luck all , I am going to need it.
P.S. I will be not be needing to drink more than one cheeky cocktail by the end of this week. I am not puffing on my E-vape constantly- at all. Also I have not contemplated increasing my nicotine at all. I did not have sexual relations with that woman! Honest…….
Posted on 2015-11-02, in POETRY-FREESTYLE/IN YER FACE/EXPERIMENTAL, WRITE TO RECOVER and tagged Creative Writing exercises, Emotions, freestyle writing, Life habits, Overcoming Writers Block, panic attacks, Poetry updates, THIS IS LIFE, WRITE TO RECOVER. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.